Be Your Best Self While Planning Your Wedding
Be Your Best Self
While Planning Your Wedding
Wedding planning can be a little bit overwhelming for any soon to be bride, but for those who are struggling with an eating disorder or body image issues, this stress can be greatly magnified. Many aspects of a wedding can be triggering for someone who is trying to recover from a life of obsessing over food and perfection. We’ve put together a few tips for handling the long road that is an engagement and the madness it entails.
Choose your entourage carefully
Unless you’re in show business, you’re probably not used to parading around in front of people in dresses that cost an arm and a leg. The kind of attention centered around appearance can be very uncomfortable for someone who is trying to overcome an eating disorder or body dysmorphia. To keep yourself and your mental health in check, invite your friends and family members who are the most supportive, and who already know what you are going through. If you don’t have a good support system in place, don’t be afraid to go alone! Not everyone wants (or needs) the over-the-top “Say Yes to the Dress” experience.
Hire good help
In times of high stress, issues like eating disorders can become quickly elevated. If it’s in the budget, we recommend minimizing your wedding to-do list by hiring a team of seasoned vendors. Let the professionals sweat the details while you have fun imagining the wedding of your dreams and spending time with all of your loved ones.
Put in the work, and we don’t mean at the gym
There is a ridiculous amount of emphasis put on getting fit for the big day, and while we can appreciate the sentiment, these messages can be harmful for some. From “sweating for the wedding” tee shirts to bridal shows with booths trying to sell you gym memberships, the message is everywhere. Many people in recovery are in the process of cutting back on obsessive exercise or are even in the middle of weight restoration. It is important to not let the wedding planning process derail your progress, which brings us back to ordering your dress.
If you are in the process of gaining weight, just order a dress one size larger than you are measured for, it can always be taken in. If you REALLY want to whoop your ass into shape before the wedding, we recommend doing so by going to therapy, seeing a nutritionist, or continuing any recovery program you are already in. Say “Screw you!” to the body shamers and keep doing your thing.
Spend A LOT of time with your fiancé
It’s easy to get caught up in the color of the napkins and the border of the invitations, but remember throughout the whole planning process that this day is a celebration of your love. Your guests aren’t really going to be as picky as you’re imagining! Your fiancé is probably also a major part of your support system, and this is a great time for the two of you to grow as a couple before starting your married life together. Your fiancé can also be a great asset in alleviating your wedding planning stress. Thinking about what your partner would like takes a lot of the pressure off of you and may help you get less caught up in the details.
Have a plan…for everything
While eventually you want to get to a place where you won’t have to think about what you are going to eat or who you are going to eat with, you may not be to that point yet. Planning can be your best aid in recovery. Make sure you always have snacks with you that you are comfortable eating so you always have a backup and your blood sugar won’t get too low, adding to your stress and causing you to freak out. Be mentally prepared for all of the “scarier” appointments, like food and cake tastings, and do what you have to do to prepare. Do your research and don’t go into anything blindly, because spontaneity isn’t always easy for someone in recovery. You know what your triggers are, so make sure to safeguard yourself against them and try to HAVE FUN!